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Initially diagnosed June 4, 2009 Invasive Ductal Carcinoma Stage II,Grade II tumor size: 2-3 cm node positive ER/PR postive HER2 Neu - negative Current Diagnosis: Metastatic Invasive Ductal Carcinoma Grade 3 Mets: Scalp/skin, Liver, Spine, Bone ER/PR + HER2/NEU -

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Friday, November 13, 2009

Burned Out

I bailed out on chemo today. I just couldn't do it today. After the last round being so bad, and only having a few days of feeling good, I just couldn't get myself to go. Now I'm feeling guilty about it, because I know I need to do it, if not for myself, but for my daughter, my husband, my family and those who care about me.

The fatigue is just so extreme that I'm really having a hard time forcing myself to go. Jesse called to see if they could do anything about the extreme fatigue, and they said there's really not much they can do. They said I could take the weekend off and reschedule for next week and it wouldn't hurt anything, so I guess I'll do that.

They said that there is a shot for the anemia that might help, but it takes a couple of rounds. I'm not sure if I want to do that or not, I'll have to research it and see what the side effects of the shots are. If they aren't too bad I might consider it. Rather frustrated with myself now for bailing out, but I just didn't have the strength today. I'm so tired of being sick, feeling helpless, having a messy house, and eating fast food. I'm tired of not being able to do things with my daughter. Today, I just want this to go away because I'm really tired of dealing with it.


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