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Initially diagnosed June 4, 2009 Invasive Ductal Carcinoma Stage II,Grade II tumor size: 2-3 cm node positive ER/PR postive HER2 Neu - negative Current Diagnosis: Metastatic Invasive Ductal Carcinoma Grade 3 Mets: Scalp/skin, Liver, Spine, Bone ER/PR + HER2/NEU -

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Thursday, July 30, 2009

Up Late and Grateful

Up late due to the pre-chemo steroids again. I took them earlier this time (around 3:30 or 4:00pm) and I'm still wired at 12:40am. I even took one of the drugs they suggested to counter the steroid... took a hot bath.. no luck. Anyhow, I thought I'd take a little time to write about some of the awesome things people have done for me during this that have just brought me tears. The support I have received so far is above and beyond anything I have ever experienced. I've always been a fairly independent person (at least after I was about 14 or 15), and rarely needed or asked for much help unless something crazy came up, and that usually only something quick and easy for the person helping. So receiving all these offers for help and support is really new ground for me.

The first group of people who offered to help were the ones that have been assisting with childcare when I have to go to all of these many tests, appointments and weekly chemotherapy sessions. Many people stepped up to offer this, but one of them went way out of her way to make sure that every weekly chemo treatment was covered for me. They do not allow children in the chemo room (for safety reasons) , so if she hadn't volunteered to do this, Jesse would not have been able to go with me to chemo each week. I really dont think I could have handled sitting there in that morgue for 2-3 hours by myself! I think I would have turned into one of the lonely hopeless half dead people myself! Anyhow, that person is my step mom, Christine. She has gone above and beyond to assist with childcare. I appreciate her, the women from church, our neighbor Misty,and Maegan for their assistance as well.

Secondly, the people who have sent me gifts, cards, and flowers to cheer me up. First of all, Jesse who allowed me to get the palm tree I saw on the side of the freeway at a nursery as we were leaving Houston. I was down in the dumps because I hadn't received what I felt we went for at MD Anderson and needed a pick me up. He willingly complied and has been helping me take care of the tree. Maegan has also been around and has been helping out around the house, watching Katie and brought me flowers the other day. I appreciate all these things more than you know!

Next, my mom's friend Cora. I haven't seen Cora since I was a child. My mom recently reconnected with her, and upon hearing about my breast cancer, she sent me the most thoughtful box full of comfort items. It contained a pink robe, some little white booties, a tea light candle and a picture frame with a motivational poem. It arrived right after I received my chemo treatment and it literally moved me to tears.

I'd also like to thank the two chemo angel volunteers from http://www.chemoangels.net/Main%20Content/how_it_works.htm who send me cards and poems every week. I am really enjoying their supportive words.

This week I received another offer for help. The women from my church are offering to bring fresh cook meals on my chemo days and the two bad days following them. How awesome is that? I think everyone in the house was getting tired of fast food and frozen dinners 3-4 days a week. I know I was! Now on my worst days, everyone gets to eat well, and its one less thing for us to worry about. A big thanks to Zaneta (who is coordinating this) and the other women who she is working with for being so thoughtful and offering this. After bringing home the first meal tonight, I think we are really going to enjoy this! That food smelled,and tasted.. (we had to try it! It smelled to good to not try it!) delicious!

Above all this, I appreciate all the prayers people have sent up for me. After only two taxol treatments I can literally feel that the tumor has shrunk. I'll know for sure next week I believe when I have to see the doctor when I go in for chemo. I seriously doubt the chemo works that fast on it's own (or I wouldn't need 12 weeks of it!). Keep praying for the tumor to shrink and the lymph nodes to be clear. Pray for the doctors to have wisdom and make the right choices that will best treat me.... and most of all Pray that I don't drive Jesse and Katie insane while they deal with me daily through my good days and bad(seriously, I'm not so much fun when I'm miserable!).


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